Here is my Ten Things I Don’t Want to Hear Two Days Before Christmas list:
- I have a Christmas lunch at work/school/preschool tomorrow. What would you like to make?
- I need to start my Christmas shopping. Can you take me to the mall?
- How about that! The guaranteed Christmas delivery wasn’t actually guaranteed.
- The turkey’s going to take three more days to thaw.
- We’re out of tape.
- Can you wrap this? And this? Oh, and this?
- I should have opened the shipping carton when it came two weeks ago. Instead of Star Wars Legos, they sent a beer pong table. We can’t give that to the kid, can we?
- Did I forget to tell you my second cousin, twice removed, will be at Christmas dinner? We have a gift for him, right? I’ve met him once, but I’m sure you could pick out something he’d love.
- The cat just threw up on your Christmas sweater. Is the dry cleaner open today?
- Were we exchanging gifts this year, or just giving them to the kids?
What don’t you want to hear two days before Christmas?
Original version published at Becoming Cliche. Reposted, in full, with permission of the author.