Here is my Ten Things I Don’t Want to Hear Two Days Before Christmas list:
- I have a Christmas lunch at work/school/preschool tomorrow. What would you like to make?
- I need to start my Christmas shopping. Can you take me to the mall?
- How about that! The guaranteed Christmas delivery wasn’t actually guaranteed.
- The turkey’s going to take three more days to thaw.
- We’re out of tape.
- Can you wrap this? And this? Oh, and this?
- I should have opened the shipping carton when it came two weeks ago. Instead of Star Wars Legos, they sent a beer pong table. We can’t give that to the kid, can we?
- Did I forget to tell you my second cousin, twice removed, will be at Christmas dinner? We have a gift for him, right? I’ve met him once, but I’m sure you could pick out something he’d love.
- The cat just threw up on your Christmas sweater. Is the dry cleaner open today?
- Were we exchanging gifts this year, or just giving them to the kids?
Merry Christmas!
What don’t you want to hear two days before Christmas?
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Original version published at Becoming Cliche. Reposted, in full, with permission of the author.
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